I suspect the world would be better if that percentage were even greater.
Short Movie Review: Twilight
Okay, it was Carmen’s turn to pick. I wanted to go see The Day The Earth Stood Still, but I usually pick movies, and Carmen has been wanting to see Twilight since it opened, and I can (usually) deny her nothing, so Twilight is what we saw.
It’s complete drek.
It’s not that it’s badly made. Technically, it displays a certain competence. The performances are reasonable. The problem is that the plot is basically what you would get if you let a fourteen year old virgin write a love story about vampires. It’s just hideous. Painful. Even the sixteen year old girls in the front row broke out laughing at some of the “dramatic” moments.
It’s trying to be all psychological. Loner girl meets loner guy who acts like he hates her. But he likes her. But he can’t be with her. Because he can’t resist her (she’s just too darned snackable). Gee, do you think they are trying to draw a parallel between the vampire’s thirst and the teen desire to have sex? Betcha nobody caught on amidst all the clever innuendo.
Watching this movie was like watching fifteen year old pop stars sing about love and relationships. I suppose if your teen daughters wanted to go see it, you could do worse: it’s only rated PG-13, and frankly is about the most tepid movie I’ve seen. There is barely any kissing, much less any violence. They won’t learn much bad by watching this.
Comments
Comment from smartone
Time 8/20/2009 at 7:21 pm
You are completely insane, and cant see a good movie if it hit you on the head.
Comment from Carola Hipple
Time 6/16/2010 at 7:23 am
I Thank you for the blog post. I really loved the readt. 🙂
Comment from prepaid sim cards
Time 7/3/2010 at 12:14 pm
Twilight makes me wish for learning how to live forever. I can’t wait for the next novel.
Comment from returning a drug test naturally
Time 7/28/2010 at 8:12 pm
We were actually kind of let down after people talked it up too much, I still thought it was a pretty good watch. My sister loved it though. To each their own.
Comment from marxy
Time 12/27/2008 at 3:38 pm
Your review is completely at odds with the views of my sixteen year old daughter. She thought it was great.
I haven’t seen it but I’m sure the metaphor isn’t lost on her and probably pretty powerful at that age.
Like you, I want to see the day the earth stood still, but I fear my strong memories of the wonderful original will doom it.
Editor’s note: Of course my review is completely at odds with that of a sixteen year old girl. That’s who this film was quite obviously made for, and it works. For the rest of the world though, it’s just silly (but admittedly mostly harmless) fluff.